Friday 22 May 2015

7 reasons Batman Can never beat superman

Yes ladies and gentlemen[yaay to equality] it has finally reached that unfortunate day the "because he's the goddamn Batman" bubble is bursted and who better to do it than a Batman fan boy? So as a great man once said you should all call Kenny Loggins because we are about to enter the...
But for argument sake i will also analyse some of the supposed times batman supposedly beat superman

2. Superman holds back...Alot

I get hurt whenever people think that whichever suit batman is wearing will probably protect him from the kryptonian but we all know that's not true. If the suit does anything it is probably protecting Batman from breaking all his bones whenever he hits superman because we all know his true kryptonian strength and it sure as hell can't be stopped by a flimsy piece of steel. Case and point the famous suit from Dark knight returns/Batman v superman was ripped into pieces the moment Clark lost his temper

3. Kryptonite isn't effective against superman

    So i'm imagining butt hurt sons of wayne are already shouting how Batman knows and owns supermans only weakness, kryptonite, but do you know who also knows and owns it? Almost half of supermans enemies not being limited to Lex Luthor( who owns a super suit similar to Bruce Wayne's powered by kryptonite), Metallo(who fights with a piece of Kryponite in his chest) and kryponite man who well you get the point

4. Way better toys

One word ladies and gents fortress of solitude. nuff said!

5. Superman is smarter

So I cant find the exact reference, forgive me senpai, but superman once said to the league "I am the invulnerable one any hit that i don't take you or somebody else will have to..." doesn't exactly prove my point but superman is a master strategist. and with the council of his father a man who was smart enough to perfectly predict the destruction of a planet whose technology is light years beyond earths and Bruce Wayne, build a ship o safely transport his son along with his own consciousness to earth and much more. furthermore superman has built a few great things in his fortress and his mind can think at the same speed as the flash which means he could process at least 1000000 different ideas at a second
Edit: i'm too lazy to find an actual speed of the flashs thought process so lets just agree that this is an acceptable estimate

6. The Sun

Remember when i promised that I will analyse some of superman's losses to batman then here's the first one. Superman has never utilized his greatest asset in any batman fight ,The yellow sun, in Dark knight Returns and what we saw from the B v S trailer Batman chooses the fight arena to be a place where the sun is completely blocked out so that superman is never at his full power but let us not forget he can always fly up into the air get a few seconds of charging and become so powerful that not even Kryptonite can affect him.
i apologize i know the man of steel costume is the worst

 7. Superman doesn't give up

We all know while Batman's battle strategy has always been take a few bumbs while learning your opponent run away and create some new toy to defeat your eneemy and return superman will always stand strong and never give up. This can be seen in the Dark knight fight when superman after taking all that Batman can dish out(most probably hearing the noisettes performing in his head the whole time)
and when he finally decides to put all his morallitty aside and sart a proper fight Batman knows he is fucked and fakes his own death to avoid the beatdown of the century. And how would superman beat Batman you ask... 

1.All of supermans powers

Yes the number one reason Superman will always beat bruce to a bloody mess all the powers tht are overlooked but rather than listing them down ill just listt some of the few ways superman can win this fight no sweat and if you can also ist a few of them in the comments below:
  1. Superman can fly into space and use his super vision+ laser vision to fry batman
  2. He could fly to gotham pick up all of batmans allies and start using them as batarangs
  3. He could literally blow Batman away.
  4. He can carry batman into the sun while he recharges
  5. He could move at the speed of a moving bullet and go around the worl and stand behind batman then kick him in the nuts
  6. He could just kick him in the nuts
  7. He could tell the world Batman is Bruce Wayne
Remember when i said nuff said about the phantom zone? well i lied
8.Phantom zone
9.The gun that increase the effect of gravity on an object as much s you want
10. The Black mercy(a plant that makes you see hallucinations of the world as you want it in Batman case it showed him his parents never died)
11. Supergirl or anyone else from Kandor
12.Fun Fact: Batman is allergic to being beaten to death

it g ma


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